Making Gray Davis Look Ethical and Talented

I have to say when the Gropenator announced his campaign for Governor, I had my doubts. He's managed to confirm virtually all of them, with the exception that he has yet to be sued by a staffer for sexual harassment or sexual assault.

The conventional wisdom out there in California is apparently that Schwarzenegger will use Nixon's Vietnam strategy, declare victory and leave, to return to the world of acting where he is still a joke, albeit one who can command 8 figures as long as the word Terminator is involved (I'm not sure exactly how much he made for Jingle All The Way, assumedly it was too much). Let this be said about the Democrats and the Republicans: we've never talked about running Streisand for office. And we certainly haven't talked about amending the Constitution to get Bruce Springsteen into the Presidency.

Our Republican friends, though, have a real problem feeling emasculated (for more on this, read the Montana Republican E-Brief). Schwarzenegger's presence made them feel like the party of men again. Finally, they had a real live groper on their side.

The problem is that Schwarzenegger can't govern. And he somehow thinks it is OK to decry special interests while taking money from special interests and vetoing legislation that they oppose. Schwarzenegger is now less popular than George W. Bush in California.

Finally, we've found a politician who makes Gray Davis look ethical and makes Jesse Ventura look like more than a one hit wonder. We could hardly have asked for a better opponent. One could guess, even, that Schwarzenegger is a robot, sent back from the future, to lose.

--Matt Singer

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